If you see a whole thing - it seems that it's always beautiful. Planets, lives... But up close a world's all dirt and rocks. And day to day, life's a hard job, you get tired, you lose the pattern. - Ursula K. LeGuin

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Five Decisions

Schmutzie answered the question "what are the five best decisions of your adult life so far?"  I thought I'd do the same.  Here they are:

  • Getting pregnant:  The decision to get pregnant was a very visceral feeling for me.  My body ached with the desire to have a child.  I was fairly young but it was a very conscious choice and I set out to do it as quickly as possible.  The result was Angel...enuf said.
  • Going to graduate school:  The decision to go to college was a no-brainer.  It was an important one and I'm glad I did it but I can't imagine a world where I didn't make that decision.  I also decided to purse a masters' degree but that decision was made from a lack of knowing what else to do with my time.  I decided to get my doctorate after I had Angel and life was busy and hectic.  I had a good job, was making good money, and did not need the degree but I really wanted it.  Without it I couldn't have the career I have today and I love my career.
  • Leaving my ex:  This is the most painful decision I've made in my life to date.  It was years in the making.  It tore both him and Angel up.  I felt tremendous guilt over the latter but it saved my life.
  • Joining an online dating service:  It was a conscious decision to join an online service after I left my ex.  I wanted to date and as a single mother working full-time and going to graduate school (with mostly female colleagues), the chances of doing it any other way were pretty slim.  Once that decision was made everything else fell into place: meeting b, convincing him to go on the first and second dates, sticking around until he figured out he loved me, moving in together, buying a house, getting married.  I suppose most people would choose the decision to marry as the more important but the marrying was far less significant than the road that led to bringing him into my life. 
  • Moving away:  We were all ready, more than ready, to leave UpNorth when we did.  It was difficult and painful but I believe I've grown in ways I never could have if I had stayed in my home city my entire life.


Annie said...

I've always said, having my son, is the best decision I ever made. The second best was leaving social services, to become a librarian.

Thank you for sharing. You've got me thinking!

jo(e) said...

It's nice to see a quick sketch of all the important decisions you've made. It made me think about my own life.