10 Ways In Which I Am A Rock Star

1. I am flexible in body, mind, and spirit.
2. I raised a sensitive soul into a responsible, intelligent, kind, loving, and funny young man.
3. I am a scholar warrior.
4. I found my voice and now help others find theirs.
5. I am juicy; I am a ripe peach that you want to bite into and let the sweet nectar run down your chin.
6. I am only getting juicier with age.
7. I found a daughter when I couldn't have one and am now helping her fine-tune her awesomeness.
8. I merge poetry and science to make people feel and think.
9. I commit to people.
10. I am present in my life.

How are you a rock star?

Five Decisions

Schmutzie answered the question "what are the five best decisions of your adult life so far?"  I thought I'd do the same.  Here they are:

• Getting pregnant:  The decision to get pregnant was a very visceral feeling for me.  My body ached with the desire to have a child.  I was fairly young but it was a very conscious choice and I set out to do it as quickly as possible.  The result was Angel...enuf said.
• Going to graduate school:  The decision to go to college was a no-brainer.  It was an important one and I'm glad I did it but I can't imagine a world where I didn't make that decision.  I also decided to purse a masters' degree but that decision was made from a lack of knowing what else to do with my time.  I decided to get my doctorate after I had Angel and life was busy and hectic.  I had a good job, was making good money, and did not need the degree but I really wanted it.  Without it I couldn't have the career I have today and I love my career.
• Leaving my ex:  This is the most painful decision I've made in my life to date.  It was years in the making.  It tore both him and Angel up.  I felt tremendous guilt over the latter but it saved my life.
• Joining an online dating service:  It was a conscious decision to join an online service after I left my ex.  I wanted to date and as a single mother working full-time and going to graduate school (with mostly female colleagues), the chances of doing it any other way were pretty slim.  Once that decision was made everything else fell into place: meeting b, convincing him to go on the first and second dates, sticking around until he figured out he loved me, moving in together, buying a house, getting married.  I suppose most people would choose the decision to marry as the more important but the marrying was far less significant than the road that led to bringing him into my life. 
• Moving away:  We were all ready, more than ready, to leave UpNorth when we did.  It was difficult and painful but I believe I've grown in ways I never could have if I had stayed in my home city my entire life.

Amazon Meme

Haven't seen or done a meme in ages. I spotted this one at Profgrrrrl, Seeking Solace, and Snarky McGeekerson's.

My first Amazon order was December 1999. I believe it was the first time I did Christmas shopping online and boy did it change my life. Previously, Christmas shopping was always hell. I was always in school and battling end-of-semester deadlines and exams. It didn't help that I'm a horrible shopper and can't stand going into stores. Then along came Amazon.

Here's what I ordered:

Phantasm (This must have been for Drax!)

Togepi and Psyduck (ahh, the Pokemon years)

Decade Review

A few people have been reviewing the last decades with year-by-year highlights. I like that idea a lot (and I'm way too tired to do the substantial posts that are brewing) so I thought I'd try it.

2000

Spent the year not-dating but secretly dating b and dating other men; was supposed to be working on my dissertation but didn't (I believe this year--along with 1999--was more about acting adolescent than adolescence actually was); TOC came into our lives.

2001

b and I got serious; Pupzilla came into our lives and made us a family; I got serious about my dissertation

2002

Defended my dissertation, graduated, got a faculty appointment, bought a house w/ b and moved outside of the city; b started his own business

2003

Lost my brother-in-law very unexpectedly, married b; b started working for horrible photographer; Angel started having serious issues with his father

2004 - 2005

Started getting into deep financial debt w/ house I loved but couldn't afford; b unemployed and then retrained as EMT and eventually paramedic; hated my own job and went on job search; discovered my research agenda. The Brute came into our lives.

2006

Found and landed current job; moved to SouthLite; spent entire year not selling house and falling deeper and deeper in debt; finally sold house at a loss in December; b took outdoor leadership course he always dreamed of and started yet another career

2007

Watched Angel graduate high school; helped Angel get into college and decide to defer; started slow process of paying off debt; learned to juggle research and teaching; started blog

2008

Met and emotionally adopted Pumpkin; sent Angel to college and dealt with the emotional fallout (mine); got obsessively serious about my research

2009

Adjusted to life post-active mothering; submitted tenure dossier; started doula training

2010 (so far)

Assisted at my first birth (separate post to follow); said good-bye to Pumpkin as she moved away to graduate school; who knows what comes next?

Books That Rocked My World

I can't believe its been 10 days since I last posted (sounds vaguely like a confession). My life has been pretty full this past week with both professional and personal issues. There are posts a-brewin' on both ends but in the meantime it feels like a good time for a book meme.

Previously I participated in a meme on influential writers. This vastly different meme is on influential books. As seen over at Academia and Me, this meme asks for you to list the first 15 books you can think of in 15 minutes that have had a profound influence on you. I sat down at a Starbucks yesterday and came up with the following*:

I'm not 100% sure why this book has always felt important to me but at the time I enjoyed stories with multiple siblings (coming from a family of 4 myself) and who doesn't love a sand fairy?

I love being read to and my mother has a great reading voice. I remember her reading the first 2 chapters to me and my sister Amy. Once she had us hooked she said we'd have to read the rest of the book ourselves. I did and then went straight on to The Lord of the Rings. It was the beginning of my love affair with sci fi/fantasy.

Another book I can attribute to my mother. My mother kept a wall of shelves in her bedroom for all of her books. Whenever I was bored or without something to read I would peruse them and ask for suggestions. This was the first in the Dragonriders of Pern series that I read. I loved it and luckily Mom had several more to keep me busy. I still dream of having a dragon of my own one day.

So far all of these books are from my elementary school years. I read Jane Goodall's classic when I was around 8 or 9. It is, I believe, what made me want to be a scientist (ok I wanted to be a palentologist when I was five--also because of a book but I can't remember the name). Jane Goodall's work combined everything I loved: nature, animals, and observation. I also remember her describing how she and her photographer husband were raising their little boy while she was doing her research in Africa. At the time (the mid-70s) such combinations of professional and personal life seemed very possible. I don't study chimpanzees but I do observe family interactions, which is really what Goodall describes in this book.

With this book we move up into my mid-20s, shortly after becoming a mother. This is one of those books that I can remember exactly where I was sitting when I read it because it caused such a strong emotional reaction in me. I remember quoting passages to my then-husband, who apparently humored me.

Around the same time I read this and my lifelong fascination with the study of motherhood was born.

This actually belongs in the days of elementary school. I first read it when I was around 10 or 11--what is now considered a "tween." I remember identifying so strongly with the protagonist--feeling his angst along with him. I've always been a rule follower and the thought of committing such a heinous crime and then living with the paranoia stayed with me for a long time. I decided to re-read it a few years ago and found him so very adolescent.


I am a little surprised by this choice, since To The Lighthouse has been such an important book for me throughout my life. However, this is the book that (a) got me started on Virginia Woolf; (b) I have a strange identification with the character, and (c) it explores gender in a way that has continues to fascinate me.

I mentioned in one of the Fairy Tale posts how I am a big fan of the King Arthur legend and this is the version that really does it for me. Here they are not young lovers but seasoned warriors and friends forced to into battle simply to "save face."

While not my first introduction to Taoism it is one of my favorite texts. It describes an approach to life I have been trying to achieve for 27 years.

Who hasn't been affected by the Chronicles of Narnia? If only Jesus really was a cuddly lion.

As I've mentioned previously, I've kept this book for 39 years because it means so much to me.

My mother gave me this book when I was "of the age" and I've kept it ever since. She didn't give it to me in lieu of "conversation"--we had a lot of those--but I appreciated being able to look things up in between talks (this was way before the internet afterall). I tried to show it to Angel, when he was "of the age" but he was having none of that. For him, talking it out was enough.

A much more recent acquisition, I asked for this book as a Christmas present several years ago. It is my favorite cookbook (Mark Bittman's How To Cook Everything Vegetarian is a close second) and is pretty much responsible for all I know about baking. In fact the recipe for my Christmas Morning Cinnamon Buns comes directly from this book.

An odd last choice, but I read this book while on a camping vacation two years ago and it seriously changed the way I think about how we do and should promote health in our society.

If you want to play along, consider yourself tagged. Feel free to list your choices in the comments or if you post them on your blog let us know so we can all follow along.

*I've listed them in the order that I thought of them, which appears to be pretty random

Influential Writers

As seen over at Dr. Crazy's.

As my regular readers know, I love me some writers. Other than individuals I know personally, I would say writers have had the largest influence on my life, so I was quite happy to see this meme.

According to the rules you are supposed to list the 25 most influential writers in your life. As others have pointed out, influential writers are not necessarily the ones who you enjoy the most nor is this a list of my top 25 most important writers. Rather it is a list of people who have influenced me over the years. I will admit, however, that I am predominately influenced by those I like. If I don't like a writer, I stop reading. Life is too short and there are far too many books to be reading something I don't enjoy.

Some are doing this in chronological order but I don't think I will be able to do so. Some writers have influenced me greatly but differently at different eras in my life. You are also supposed to tag 25 people to do this, but that is too tall of a task. Instead I will invite you all to play along.

1. Octavia Butler
2. Ursula K LeGuin
3. Virginia Woolf
4. Toni Morrison
5. Doris Lessing
6. T.S. Eliot
7. Anne Carson
8. Carol Gilligan
9. A.A. Milne
10. Grace Paley
11. Maxine Hong Kingston
12. Jane Austin
13. George Eliot
14. Leo Tolstoy
15. Dr. Seuss
16. Tillie Olson
17. bell hooks
18. Sara Ruddick
19. Carolyn Heilbrun
20. Adrienne Rich
21. Mary Oliver
22. Nikki Giovanni
23. Mary Shelley
24. E.B. White
25. Henry James

It is also very interesting to follow the links back to see other people's choices. It makes me want to start following new blogs. I suppose it is similar to the saying "a friend of X's is a friend of mine."

Ahhh...A Book Meme

how can I resist? As seen over at K8's:

BBC Book List

Apparently the BBC reckons most people will have only read 6 of the 100 books here.
Instructions:
1) Look at the list and put an ‘x’ after those you have read.
2) Add a ‘+’ to the ones you LOVE.
3) Star (*) those you plan on reading.

1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen X+
2 The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien X+
3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte X
4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee X
6 The Bible -
7 Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte X
8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell X
9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens
11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott X
12 Tess of the D’Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy X
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien X+
17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks
18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger X
19 The Time Traveller’s Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot X+
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell
22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald
23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy X+
25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
26 Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky X+
28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
29 Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll X
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame X+
31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy X+
32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis X
34 Emma - Jane Austen X+
35 Persuasion - Jane Austen X++ (my favorite Austen)
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis X+
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
38 Captain Corelli’s Mandolin - Louis De Berniere
39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne X
41 Animal Farm - George Orwell X
42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48 The Handmaid’s Tale - Margaret Atwood X
49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding X
50 Atonement - Ian McEwan
51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel
52 Dune - Frank Herbert X
53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen X+
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon X
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck X
62 Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold X
65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68 Bridget Jones’s Diary - Helen Fielding
69 Midnight’s Children - Salman Rushdie
70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville
71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
72 Dracula - Bram Stoker
73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett X+
74 Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
75 Ulysses - James Joyce
76 The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath
77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78 Germinal - Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray
80 Possession - AS Byatt
81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker X
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
87 Charlotte’s Web - EB White X+
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Alborn
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90 The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton
91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery X
93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks
94 Watership Down - Richard Adams X+
95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
96 A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
98 Hamlet - William Shakespeare
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo

Total Read: 34 - Actually far more than I anticipated since the list is rather male dominated (really--no Virginia Woolf????) and I spent at least a third of my life only reading female authors. It is also interesting that I seem to have no plans to read any of the ones I missed.

Feminist Mothering

blue milk is one of my all-time favorite blogs. She has a standing set of questions on feminism and mothering that I have always meant to answer and it seems I finally have. Some of the questions seem strange to me, since I am on the "other side" of mothering, but I did my best. I wonder if others who are no longer actively mothering have attempted this?

1.How would you describe your feminism in one sentence? When did you become a feminist? Was it before or after you became a mother?

One sentence? That's tough. Let's see. I live life under the assumption that men and women have equal rights to the resources we all need, want and use to live and flourish. I live life under the assumption that the same rights exist for any human regardless of the category we wish to assign the individual. In my daily existence I believe that how we do gender matters and I try to voice how it matters. See I knew I couldn't do it in a sentence.

I was raised a feminist. I grew up in the 70's. My mother left my father, went back to school, found a set of like-minded although younger and more radical friends, bought me "Free To Be You and Me" and took me to teen NOW meetings. I spent my teens and early 20s reading feminist literature and feeling angry.

Motherhood didn't make me a feminist, rather it, and my first marriage, set my feminism back several decades.

2. What has surprised you most about motherhood?

The intensity of my feelings and being both completely adored and needed by one person. I was used to feeling needed but not adored--not loved so unconditionally and so intensely. It was a love affair like no other and it threw me. It also saved me--emotionally. I was forced to deal with issues I had previously never recognized.

What surprises me now is that the love affair is over. I've been effectively (but sweetly) dumped. I know I should have but I didn't see it coming.

3. How has your feminism changed over time? What is the impact of motherhood on your feminism?

My feminism has changed dramatically over the years. The anger has significantly abated. I have a deeper understanding of the issues, mostly due to the luxury of a job where I am paid to research and ponder questions of gender, race and class. I am both more and less optimistic about change happening: more because the longer I live the more I can see the small changes and believe they mean something; less because I no longer believe radical change and revolution are trustworthy or all that beneficial.

As I mentioned, initially motherhood set me back. I was young and I believe many young people become rigid out of fear. They hold onto the roles and identities they have just discovered with dear life so they don't lose their new and bitterly earned sense of self. In thinking I was defying traditional roles of mother and wife I ended up embracing them. However it was also motherhood that snapped me out of it. It was a desire to be true to myself in front of my son--to let him know the Brigindo that I like best--that led me to find my voice as a mother and to discover what it could mean to be a feminist mother.

4. What makes your mothering feminist? How does your approach differ from a non-feminist mother’s? How does feminism impact upon your parenting?

I find it hard to distinguish what makes my mothering feminist from what makes me feminist. Perhaps it is because I've been mothering for over 19 years now and I can no longer see where one identity ends and another begins. My mothering is feminist because I am a feminist and I bring a feminist outlook to everything I do.

In some ways I believe my mothering has always been feminist, however as I mentioned previously I also feel that when I first became a wife and a mother my feminism took several steps backwards. So how do I reconcile this? My initial clinging to the role of perfect mother and wife set-back my feminism but my approach to raising my son was always that of Rich's "outlaw to the institution of motherhood."

From the beginning I refused to alter how we interacted, how our relationship developed--its mutuality and interdependence--in spite of some fierce criticism and social pressure. I was told I was raising a mama's boy and that he would never leave (Ha! I wish). In the early years I ALWAYS felt I was doing the wrong thing I just couldn't do it any other way. In many ways I did raise a mama's boy (he actually announced it proudly at a dinner party once when he was 13...you should have seen the adults' faces as they tried not to comment or laugh) however it seems I raised a very independent one. I also appear to have raised a feminist. Go figure.

5. Do you ever feel compromised as a feminist mother? Do you ever feel you’ve failed as a feminist mother?

Generally I don't "do failure." Not that I don't make mistakes, I make plenty but I tend to reframe them in my mind. I'm more likely to see them as learning experiences or as who I had to be to get to where I am now. I try to be very generous with myself. I think everyone should be.

But perhaps explaining why I feel my feminism took a backseat when I first became a mother is a better answer to this question. When I first had Angel I was the main breadwinner in my family. We both knew I had to go back to work as soon as possible (after 2 months of paid leave) and become the sole breadwinner. My ex stayed home with the baby during the day and taught martial arts (for very little or no pay) at night. I would come home and take over the parenting at night. I also attempted to take class with my ex at the dojo, with Angel running around, but if things got too unruly Angel and I would have to go home.

Mr. Mom was a fairly unusual arrangement 20 years ago and I thought it confirmed my feminism. Instead I worked nonstop as breadwinner and mother (and still tried to be #1 student in the dojo whenever possible). In many ways I overcompensated for not being home during the day by trying to the perfect mom at nights and on weekends. Did I mentioned I did all the cooking and cleaning too? Yeah, not so feminist of an approach.

6. Has identifying as a feminist mother ever been difficult? Why?

To be honest I don't remember ever having difficulty identifying as a feminist. I can't imagine people meeting me and not recognizing me as a feminist mother. Perhaps this wasn't as strong when I was a young mother. People, especially older men, tend to assume all sorts of things about young women. My life was pretty frazzled and intense then so I don't remember if I had these difficulties. Most likely I was too tired to notice.

7. Motherhood involves sacrifice, how do you reconcile that with being a feminist?

I believe being a family means being willing to make sacrifices as well as compromises. To me understanding that need is what it means to be in relationship with another person--whether that is a partner or a child. Healthy families recognize that there is a balance that needs to be achieved between individual level needs, relationship (dyadic) needs, and family system needs and they actively work at trying to achieve that balance (of course they don't always manage it). So sometimes people make personal sacrifices and sometimes there are relationship sacrifices and sometimes there are family sacrifices. For this to work, you have to be willing to let others in the family make sacrifices for you. I think the hegemony of motherhood often stops us from allowing others to sacrifice for us. So I guess the answer to the question is that it has taken me a long time to understand that "motherhood means sacrifice" does not mean mothers are solely responsible for sacrifice. I think this is an important feminist principle. In fact I would probably argue that the phrase "motherhood means sacrifice" is decidedly unfeminist.

8. If you have a partner, how does your partner feel about your feminist motherhood? What is the impact of your feminism on your partner?

My partners have always been proud of my feminism. My ex, however, only liked it when it didn't infringe upon what he felt were his rights or his pleasures. While there were instances where we would clash over my feminist mothering, they were few and far between. Mostly we didn't clash. This is because I had not learned the lesson outlined above and embraced sacrifice. Once I stopped embracing it I had to leave.

My current partner is 180 degrees different. I honestly have no idea how my feminism has impacted him. I think you'd need to ask him that question. I know he thinks our son is amazing and that it is all because of me. I know he refuses to acknowledge the importance of his own parenting and I doubt he would analyze it in terms of feminism. I know I wish he was my son's biological father and that we could have shared him from the beginning.

9. If you’re an attachment parenting mother, what challenges if any does this pose for your feminism and how have you resolved them?

Yeah, I'm not really too up on the whole attachment parenting thing. I think the term (and maybe the practice) came into vogue a little to late for me. However my son grew up by my side; he was allowed in my bed when he wanted until he stopped at around 6; I took him out of school so he could travel with me for work on numerous occasions; and I let him know at all times that I was physically and emotionally there for him. I'm not sure how closely that resembles attachment parenting but I got a lot of flak for it (see above answer about raising a dependent mama's boy). In the beginning I felt guilty but couldn't see any other way of being his mother. Eventually I realized I was right and they were wrong and stopped worrying about it. Now that he's grown I've told him about the reactions I got and he's flabbergasted that any one have doubted that it was the right approach for him. Then he laughs and tells me that we showed them.

But I'm not understanding why this would pose a challenge to my feminism? Perhaps I am misunderstanding the phrase. To me being a feminist mother is ignoring the hegemonic discourse of motherhood and following the path that you believes works for yourself and your child. If that means living a life that on the surface looks "unfeminist" (as in being a SAHM?), who cares? People who think feminism resides in actions such as paid employment or wearing sensible shoes really don't understand feminism.

10. Do you feel feminism has failed mothers and if so how? Personally, what do you think feminism has given mothers?

Again, I'd rather avoid the whole "failure" discussion. Perhaps feminism had to take the stances it took and make the mistakes it made to get to the point where it is now. For me that point is to go beyond simplistic views of feminist action and to own up to mothering as a critical feminist issue. However I also believe that if we want to deconstruct the weight and pressure of hegemonic motherhood we need to be willing to truly share the power of mothering with our partners (not just the chores or the nurturing).

Yes motherhood provides women a power--while at the same time as it exposes our powerlessness--that is normally kept from us. I believe that expecting women to give that up without providing opportunity for real power is unrealistic and foolish but I also believe that thinking womenkind can find true power by ignoring motherhood is equally as foolish and it hurts the very people you are trying to advance.

Watching The BoobTube

As seen at Sleeping in the Forest, its another meme but this one got me thinking about television viewing so I added a post at the end. Here are the instructions:

1. Bold the shows you watch/used to watch.
2. Italicize the shows you’ve seen at least one episode of.
3. Bold and italicize the shows you own* on DVD.
4. Post your answers.

50. Quantum Leap

49. Prison Break

48. Veronica Mars

47. Star Trek: Deep Space Nine

46. Sex & The City

45. Farscape

44. Cracker

43. Star Trek

42. Only Fools and Horses

41. Band of Brothers

40. Life on Mars

39. Monty Python

38. Curb Your Enthusiasm

37. Star Trek: The Next Generation

36. Father Ted

35. Alias

34. Frasier

33. CSI Las Vegas

32. Babylon 5

31. Deadwood

30. Dexter

29. ER

28. Fawlty Towers

27. Six Feet Under

26. Red Dwarf

25. Futurama (w/ Angel)

24. Twin Peaks (saw one show for the first time a few months ago)

23. The Office

22. The Shield

21. Angel

20. Blackadder

19. Scrubs (with Angel)

18. Arrested Development

17. South Park (with Angel)

16. Dr Who

15. Heroes

14. Firefly

13. Battlestar Galactica

12. Family Guy (Yeah, Angel forced this one)

11. Seinfeld

10. Spaced

09. The X-Files

08. The Wire

07. Friends

06. 24

05. Lost

04. The West Wing

03. The Sopranos

02. Buffy the Vampire Slayer

01. The Simpsons (mostly with Angel)

Growing up we had a small black and white TV with the classic wire hanger antenna and pliers to change the channel. My mother had left my father, taken the four of us and went to graduate school. We were living on her teaching assistant stipend and loans.

My mother also has always hated TV. My sisters and I would gather around "the boob tube" (as my mother called it) to watch such classics as Mary Tyler Moore, Rhoda, and All In the Family (ok, we also watched Eight is Enough and Fantasy Island). Periodically my mother would emerge from her room, stand behind us, and start a critical analysis of whatever show we were watching. It did not add to my viewing pleasure.

I write all this as an explanation of why I think I've never been all that into TV (although my son and both my husbands feel quite differently). There are shows I definitely love (West Wing was probably the best written show ever) but I'm a reader and will almost always choose a book over a TV show. Even so, over the years I have managed to watch and follow a great many shows--with few of them represented on this list. What about M.A.S.H.? Where's Cheers? or NYPD Blue? How about Homicide: Life on the Streets? Let's not forget Good Times, Maude or Sanford & Son. Honestly I haven't heard of about a third of the shows on this list and it is making me feel very old.

A Meme For The Old year

As seen everywhere:

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before.

Sent my son to college.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

This year I tried a New Year's theme, but honestly that didn't seem to work too well. I have a few goals brewing and may post them later.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

b's friend from junior high had his first child, but they are neither physically nor emotionally close to me. One of my grad students had a little girl.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

My sensei and I miss him.

5. What countries did you visit?

None. I barely did any traveling this year.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?

Tenure. I'll put my packet in this year but probably won't have the official answer until 2010.

Peace

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

I'm actually horrible with remembering dates but August 20th will stay. That was the day we took Angel to college.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Getting through it.

9. What was your biggest failure?

I don't do failure.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

A touch of the crud early in the year and my normal migraines but no real illness. As for injury, I've had tendinitis in my shoulder for several months now.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

Angel's education.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

b. He couldn't have been better.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

The Mormon Church

14. Where did most of your money go?

Angel's tuition

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Obama's election
Angel finishing the semester with a 3.4 GPA

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?

Walk Away - Ben Harper

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?

a) sadder
b) fatter
c) poorer

doesn't sound like a great year, does it?

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

exercising, camping/hiking

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

eating, spending money, missing Angel

20. How will you be spending Christmas?

b and I spent it alone, at home, eating, drinking and enjoying each other's company

21. Did you fall in love in 2008?

I fall deeper in love everyday

22. How many one-night stands?

Thankfully none

23. What was your favorite TV program?

I'm so bad with favorites. This year I've really enjoyed Battle Star Galactica, Grey's Anatomy, and downloading the first season of NYPD Blue

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

I generally don't do hate but there are a few extra people I'd rather not spend time with

25. What was the best book you read?

Can't limit it to one. Here's what I've enjoyed:

War and Peace
In the Time of Butterflies (Julia Alvarez)
Rereading all of Octavia Butler's work

I'm currently reading Their Eyes Were Watching God and loving it.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Ben Harper
Jenny Lewis

27. What did you want and get?

For Angel to be happy at college and do well

28. What did you want and not get?

For Angel to come home

29. What was your favorite film of this year?

I saw way more movies and films (in the theater and downloads) than usual this year. Most were ok at best. Trouble the Waters was phenomenal. Foot Fist Way was about the worst movie I've seen in my life.

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 43 this year. On my birthday I went to work, attended a few meetings, had a migraine, and went out to a lovely dinner with b and Angel.

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

More Angel, less meetings

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?

outdoorsy academic?

33. What kept you sane?

b

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Obama

35. What political issue stirred you the most?

Prop 8

36. Who did you miss?

Angel and Sensei

37. Who was the best new person you met?

Pumpkin

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.

Not all socks are equal. There are some exceptional ones out there and you shouldn't accept less.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

What are you changing?
Who do you think you're changing?
You can't change things, we're all stuck in our ways
It's like trying to clean the ocean
What do you think you can drain it?
Well it was poison and dry long before you came
-Jenny Lewis

I Guess I Don't Get Out Enough

As seen at Seeking Solace's:

1. Started my own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than I can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland/world
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sung a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched lightening at sea
14. Taught myself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown my own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitchhiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of my ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught myself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied - this doesn't take much for me
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing - barely
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had my portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma.
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check - more times than I care to remember
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy - Teddy is still on my dresser
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten caviar - luckily I don't like it
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square - many times, once even for New Years Eve
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job .
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had my picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox - 3 days before my first wedding
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous - Tom Berenger
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Ridden an elephant

"Jet Airliner" - Music Meme

As seen over at Dr. Curmudgeon's

A little music meme to fill the time. As always, it comes with rules:

Put your iTunes or MP3 player on shuffle

1. For each question, press the next button to get your answer
2. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
3. Tag 10 friends who might enjoy doing the game as well as the person you got the note from.

So tagging 10 people is way too much work for a silly music meme filler. So we'll break that rule. Play along if you like.

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
"Feeling Good" - Nina Simone

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
"Teach Me Tonight" - Dinah Washington

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
"Stubborn Kind of Fellow" - Marvin Gaye

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
"Send The Marines" - Tom Lehrer

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
"Hesitation Blues " Roy Bookbinder & Jorma Kaukonen

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
"Johnny B. Goode" - Jonny Lang

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
"Witchcraft" - Marvin Gaye

WHAT IS 2+2?
"Our House" - Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
"O Holy Night" - Tracy Chapman

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
"Bang Bang (my baby shot me)" - Sonny & Cher

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
"Black Boys" - Hair Soundtrack

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
"This Will Be (An Everlasting Love)" - Natalie Cole

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
"Sunshine on My Shoulder" - John Denver

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
"Truth Is" - Fantasia Barrino

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
"Matrimony" - Gilbert O'Sullivan

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
"The Hunter Gets Captured By The Game" - The Marvelettes

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
"Will It Go Round In Circles" - Billy Preston

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
"The Joint Is Jumpin'" - Fats Waller

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
"Vincent" - deb talan

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
"Walk On By" - Dionne Warwick

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
"Burn One Down" - Ben Harper

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
"I'm The Only One" - Melissa Etheridge

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
"She's So Cold" - Rolling Stones

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
"In Your Eyes" - Ben Harper

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
"That Old Black Magic" - The Rat Pack

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
"Maybellene" - Chuck Berry

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
"I'm So Tired" - The Beatles

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
"Jet Airliner" - Steve Miller Band

A Meme to Past the Time

Saw this over at Seeking Solace and thought it would be fun:

LAYER ONE:

* Name: Brigindo
* Birthday: May 7
* Birthplace: ReallyBigCity
* Current location: SouthLite
* Eye color: Brown
* Hair color: Brown
* Height: 5'3
* Righty or lefty: Righty
* Zodiac sign: Taurus

LAYER TWO:

* Your heritage: English, Irish, Italian and German
* The shoes you wore today: Keens!
* Your weakness: Angel
* Your fears: failure
* Your perfect pizza: John's in NYC
* Goal you’d like to achieve: tenure, getting Angel through college, owning land somewhere pretty

LAYER THREE:

* Your most overused phrase on AIM: heya
* Your first waking thoughts: do I really have to get up?
* Your best physical feature: Hair? Butt? Boobs? It's all good
* Your most missed memory: Angel as a little boy; Baking or gardening with my grandmother

LAYER FOUR:

* Pepsi or Coke: Don't do soda
* McDonald’s or Burger King: don't do fast food
* Single or group dates: Single
* Adidas or Nike: New Balance
* Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Don't do iced tea
* Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate
* Cappuccino or coffee: decaf skim latte

LAYER FIVE:

* Smoke: For 1 week when I was 12
* Cuss: Not my style
* Sing: Alone in the car
* Take a shower everyday: Yes
* Do you think you’ve been in love: I don't think it; I know it
* Want to go to college: Liked it so much I made it a career
* Liked high school: No.
* Want to get married: Both times
* Believe in yourself: Absolutely
* Get motion sickness: No
* Think you’re attractive: Absolutely
* Think you’re a health freak: I'm into health and I'm a freak but not a health freak
* Get along with your parent(s): Define "get along"
* Like thunderstorms: Love 'em...especially in the summer
* Play an instrument: Alas, no. Took guitar lessons for a few months when I was nine but it didn't stick

LAYER SIX: In the past month…

* Drank alcohol: frequently
* Smoked: No
* Done a drug: Does Imitrex count?
* Made out: No but thanks for reminding me
* Gone on a date: Yes
* Gone to the mall: Thankfully no
* Eaten an entire box of Oreos: No
* Eaten sushi: No. SouthLite doesn't do sushi well
* Been on stage: No
* Been dumped: No
* Gone skating: No
* Made homemade cookies: Yes
* Gone skinny dipping: No
* Dyed your hair: No but it needs it
* Stolen Anything: No

LAYER SEVEN: Ever…

* Played a game that required removal of clothing: No
* Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: Yes
* Been caught “doing something”: Yes but not since I was 15
* Been called a tease: Uhm, no
* Gotten beaten up: No
* Shoplifted: Don't remember but somehow I feel I must have at some point
* Changed who you were to fit in: Hasn't everyone?

LAYER EIGHT:

* Age you hope to be married: First time I was 23, second time 37
* Numbers and names of children: 1 - Angel
* Describe your dream wedding: I don't dream about weddings
* How do you want to die: With dignity and before Angel does
* Where you want to go to college: I'd never get another degree but my undergrad was done in a small liberal arts college in the middle of the city that had absolutely no requirements
* What do you want to be when you grow up: a little old lady
* What country would you most like to visit: Lately I've been wanting to see Greece

LAYER NINE:

* Number of drugs taken illegally: Too many to count
* Number of people I could trust with my life: 2
*Number of CDs that I own: Uhm, more like number of songs: 2517; 6.8 days; 10.23 GB
* Number of piercings: Two; earlobes but I believe they are completely closed
* Number of tattoos: None
* Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: None that I know of
* Number of scars on my body: 2 - chin and wrist

As Seen Around the Blogosphere

Your result for Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz...

You Are a Joan!

You are a Joan -- "I need to succeed"

Joans are energetic, optimistic, self-assured, and goal oriented.

How to Get Along with Me

• * Leave me alone when I am doing my work.


• * Give me honest, but not unduly critical or judgmental, feedback.


• * Help me keep my environment harmonious and peaceful.


• * Don't burden me with negative emotions.


• * Tell me you like being around me.


• * Tell me when you're proud of me or my accomplishments.

What I Like About Being a Joan

• * being optimistic, friendly, and upbeat


• * providing well for my family


• * being able to recover quickly from setbacks and to charge ahead to the next challenge


• * staying informed, knowing what's going on


• * being competent and able to get things to work efficiently


• * being able to motivate people

What's Hard About Being a Joan

• * having to put up with inefficiency and incompetence


• * the fear on not being -- or of not being seen as -- successful


• * comparing myself to people who do things better


• * struggling to hang on to my success


• * putting on facades in order to impress people


• * always being "on." It's exhausting.

Joans as Children Often

• * work hard to receive appreciation for their accomplishments


• * are well liked by other children and by adults


• * are among the most capable and responsible children in their class or school


• * are active in school government and clubs or are quietly busy working on their own projects

Joans as Parents

• * are consistent, dependable, and loyal


• * struggle between wanting to spend time with their children and wanting to get more work done


• * expect their children to be responsible and organized

Take Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz at HelloQuizzy

Randomness

Nit tagged me for one of those fun random memes and it was wonderful timing on her part because people--I've got bupkiss..nada...zilch..zero....NOTHING these days.

Here are the obligatory rules:

1. Link to the person who tagged you
2. Post the rules on your blog
3. Write 6 random things about yourself
4. Tag 6 people at the end of your post and link to them
5. Let each person you have tagged know by leaving a comment on their blog
6. Let the tagger know when your entry is posted.

Below are random Brigindo factoids:

1. I've had an hourglass figure for most of my life. However as I grow older my hourglass holds more sand.
2. I don't particularly like cakes but I love cupcakes...especially chocolate ones.
3. My chocolate must be dark.
4. My father was an only child, my first husband was an only child and my son is an only child (well technically he has half- and step-siblings but he was certainly raised as an only child). I am the youngest of four.
5. My father died when I was sixteen. I met my first husband when I was sixteen. He was 18 years older than me and my teacher. You don't have to be Freud to figure that one out.
6. I have 5 nieces and nephews. They range in age from 4 to 22. I find it amazing to see an entire new generation of my family growing up. They are so much more together then we were/are.

So in addition to having NOTHING these days I'm really not in the mood to tag anyone. You're on your own. If it sounds like fun, play along.

Complete the:

As seen over at Dr. Curmudgeon's:

1. My uncle once: wrote for a pornographic magazine.
2. Never in my life: have I been as blessed as I am now.
3. When I was five: my parents bought me a cat who hated children.
4. High school was: filled with nerds and yet I still hated it.
5. I will never forget: giving birth...that's why I never did it again.
6. Once I met: Alan Alda in my best friend's living room.
7. There’s this boy I know: who's about to embark on an amazing journey.
8. Once, at a bar: I kissed b for the very first time.
9. By noon, I’m usually: almost awake and mostly coherent.
10. Last night: b and I enjoyed cocktails on the veranda.
11. If only I had: high cheekbones I could wear my hair really short.
12. Next time I go to church: the devil will cry.
13. What worries me most: is turning the corner and meeting overwhelming grief.
14. When I turn my head left I see: b surfing the internet.
15. When I turn my head right I see: Pupzilla chewing her leg.
16. You know I’m lying when: I stammer and turn several shades of red.
17. What I miss most about the Eighties is: irrelevant since I can't remember the Eighties.
18. If I were a character in Shakespeare I’d be: played by a man.
19. By this time next year: I'll be submitting my tenure packet.
20. A better name for me would be: Snorsie McSnorington
21. I have a hard time understanding: materialism.
22. If I ever go back to school, I’ll: know that I lost my mind.
23. You know I like you if: I cook for you.
24. If I ever won an award, the first person I would thank would be: my husband, who is responsible for the rotation of my world.
25. Take my advice, never: say never.
26. My ideal breakfast is: waffles and eggs!
27. A song I love but do not have is: impossible to find.
28. If you visit my hometown: pick up the pace and, no matter what, DO NOT stop in the middle of the sidewalk to gawk at the buildings.
29. Why won’t people: save the whales?
30. If you spend a night at my house: you share a bed with Pupzilla.
32. The world could do without: McMansions.
33. I’d rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: live through adolescence again.
34. My favourite blonde(s) is/are: Boy.
35. Paper clips are more useful than: academic committees.
36. If I do anything well it’s: completely by accident.
37. I can’t help but: smile when Boy calls me "mama."
38. I usually cry: quietly.
39. My advice to my child/nephew/niece: is "be yourself."
40. And by the way: consider yourself tagged.

Home

This meme was started over at a quatre pattes who tagged blue milk who sent out an open tag. I really liked both of their lists. Here are the instructions:

Write 5 memories from places you have called home. If you are uncomfortable about revealing the location just use House #1, House #2, etc. Tag 5 bloggers from around the world and send them a link letting them know they've been tagged.

Here's mine:

Grandma's House

• Roses and tomatoes every summer in Grandma's garden
• Watching Grandma scrub the floor on her knees
• Riding my tricycle in the basement while my mother hung clothes
• My father suffering from a "hang nail"
• My grandfather's face through the bars of his hospital bed

Dingy Apt #1 - Big City

• Starting a garden on the fire escape with avocado pits
• Really big cockroaches in the kitchen
  
• Picking through the abandoned lot for "buried treasure"
• Sleeping in closets
• Waiting for my turn to visit Grandma for the weekend

Aunt's House-Suburban Town

• Hotdog dinners with my aunt, uncle, 6 cousins and 1 sister
• Sleeping in the (mostly)finished basement with my sister
• Riding my bike to school everyday
• Hiking through the abandoned parkway with my oldest cousin
• Joining 4H

Dingy Apt #2 - Big City

• Missing my dog
• A man pulling a knife on me in the lobby and forcing me into the elevator which went up instead of down because my sister and her boyfriend were waiting on the top floor.
  
• My mother coming home to find my sister's boyfriend in her wedding dress as we hosted a mock wedding
• My mother telling us my father had died and feeling like I wanted to laugh
  
• The man who became my ex-husband moving in with us after he left his wife

Tiny Apt Across the River from Big City

• Living on $3 a day
• Teaching myself to cook in a huge old fashioned kitchen
• Typing college papers with an old manual typewriter on a fold-away table
• My sister moving in after my mother got evicted from Dingy Apt #2
• Walking 11 blocks to the train station on crutches every day with a broken ankle
  

Not-So-Tiny Apt Back in Big City

• Moving in and discovering Sensei lived across the street and had a wife and child
• Singing songs to Boy while he was still on the inside
• The neighborhood children shouting "Baldy" everytime I walked by with Boy in his stroller
• Boy throwing back his arms and crowing with joy as we played in the park beneath the bridge.
• Boy laughing after he played his first practical joke by making me get off the couch and then stealing my seat.

Beautiful Apt on the River in Big City

• Sitting in the window with Boy and watching thunderstorms on summer nights
• Boy running laps around the living room and the irate man who lived below ringing the doorbell
• Long walks with Boy in the park and stopping by the cafe that looked like a castle to share some cheesecake
• Studying for a statistics exam and forgetting I was supposed to pick Boy up from a birthday party
• Sitting in the window while Etta James played on the stereo and Boy played in the other room wondering why it had to hurt so bad.
  

Big Apt In Yucky Neighborhood in Big City

• Boy on the phone with his Dad crying on our first night and then his Dad telling me it was all my fault.
  
• Me crying on my friend's shoulder the next day when I saw she had scrubbed the disgusting bathtub until it looked like new.
• Finally having space to breathe
• Talking to b on the phone and convincing him it was worthwhile to meet me
• b hanging a heavy bag in the living room for me.
  

House on 3 Acres - 1 Hour North of Big City

• Drinking champagne with b and Boy on the floor of the empty living room the night we closed
• Growing roses and tomatoes
• Getting married one afternoon in front of a judge with Boy standing besides us and then going out for lunch and bowling
  
• Shoveling snow
• Baking cinnamon buns for Christmas breakfast

Tiny House in Small City

• Hanging out in the backyard with b and Boy in January and realizing we're all wearing t-shirts
  
• Seeing The Brute stroll up to the door after being lost for 3 days
• Walking to work
• Going camping for Thanksgiving
• Breathing

I'm not going to tag anyone in particular but invite you all to play along. But do drop a line and let me know.

ABC Meme

Just what today called for: a new meme! This one was spotted over at Seeking Solace.

Accent: Very heavy, very distinctive. People always know where I'm from.

Booze: Tequila, straight-up, no training wheels; Guinness, an occasional glass of white

Chore I Hate: Meal Planning

Dog or Cat: Love 'em both but I've never lived without a cat

Essential Electronics: (1) MacBook (2) Ipod

Favorite Cologne(s): Don't wear 'em

Gold or Silver: Don't care - only jewelery I wear is the necklace Boy gave me for my birthday, which is gold

Hometown: Biggest city in the world

Insomnia: Not me. I fall out the minute my head hits the pillow. Poor b on the other hand is up half the night listening to me snore

Job Title: Associate Professor

Kids: 1 amazing son who's about to start his independent life

Living arrangements: Rent small house in small city

Most admirable trait: I remain calm and have the ability to calm others

Number of sexual partners: 1 now and that's all that counts

Overnight hospital stays: Once as an adult (giving birth to Boy) and once as an infant when I had pneumonia

Phobias: As in true phobias? None. But really big bugs can wig me out sometimes

Quote: "I learned to make my mind large, as the universe is large, so that there is room for contradictions." Maxine Hong Kingston

Religion: Taoist

Siblings: Three older sisters

Time I wake up: Depends on the day but lately not before 9:00

Unusual talent or skill: I can see the big picture when everyone is haggling over the details.

Vegetable I refuse to eat: Beets

Worst habit: Being judgmental (I don't know if it's my worst but it's the one I hate the most because it is so like my mother)

X-rays: Left ankle, right wrist (twice)

Yummy foods I make: Bread, cupcakes, arroz con pollo, baked ziti - to name a few

Zodiac sign: Taurus

Getting To Know You Meme

The lovely and very funny Deb was kind enough to tag me for this little meme that has been circulating the blogosphere.

Here are the rules:

The rules of the game get posted at the beginning. Each player answers the questions about themselves. At the end of the post, the player then tags 5-6 people and posts their names, then go to their blogs and leave them a comment, letting them know they have been tagged and asking them to read your blog.

1. What was I doing 10 years ago?

I was in the middle of breaking up with my first husband (Boy's dad). It was a long, difficult and painful process. I finally told him I wanted a divorce (after about 4 years of seriously thinking about it) in June 1998 and then spent the next 6 months getting him to accept it. I was also working at snooty medical school, trying to write my dissertation and helping Boy deal with his recently diagnosed learning disability. Not a fun year.

2. Five things on my to do list for today.

Dojo (check), Rock Climb, Food Shopping, Figure out Dinner, Research/Writing

3. Snacks I enjoy.

Does Guiness count as a snack?

I'm actually not a snack-y person. I like meals. Big hearty meals. Preferably with cheese. But I do like cashews, hummus, avocado (yes it's a snack), really sharp cheddar, crusty bread, and home-grown tomatoes. (Hmmm. Maybe that can be dinner)

4. Things I would do if I was a billionaire.


Put Boy through college with no worries. Trust funds for all the other kids in our family (9 between b and I). Buy a lot of land in the middle of nowhere and build a very small house on it. Travel with b around South America. Buy b something like this:

5. Places I have lived.

Born and raised in the City Like No Other. Lived for 4 years in suburban-rural town 1 hour north of City Like No Other. Now live here in Small City-Big Town, South-Lite

6. People I want to know more about.

I'll pick some of my new bloggy friends from NaComLeavMo:

Nit
Calliope
Heather
MsPrufrock
MoxieMama

Thanks for playing!

A Book Meme

As seen over at Radical Mama:

The top 100 or so books most often marked as “unread” by LibraryThing’s users. Bold the books you have read, underline the ones you read for school, italicize the ones you started but didn’t finish.

Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell
Anna Karenina
Crime and Punishment
Catch-22
One Hundred Years of Solitude
Wuthering Heights
The Silmarillion
Life of Pi : a novel
The Name of the Rose
Don Quixote
Moby Dick
Ulysses
Madame Bovary
The Odyssey
Pride and Prejudice
Jane Eyre
The Tale of Two Cities
The Brothers Karamazov
Guns, Germs, and Steel
War and Peace
Vanity Fair
The Time Traveler’s Wife
The Iliad
Emma
The Blind Assassin
The Kite Runner
Mrs. Dalloway
Great Expectations
American Gods
A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius
Atlas Shrugged
Reading Lolita in Tehran : a memoir in books
Memoirs of a Geisha
Middlesex
Quicksilver
Wicked : the life and times of the wicked witch of the West
The Canterbury Tales
The Historian : a novel
A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
Love in the Time of Cholera
Brave New World
The Fountainhead
Foucault’s Pendulum
Middlemarch
Frankenstein
The Count of Monte Cristo
Dracula
A Clockwork Orange
Anansi Boys
The Once and Future King
The Grapes of Wrath
The Poisonwood Bible
1984
Angels & Demons
Inferno
The Satanic Verses
Sense and Sensibility
The Picture of Dorian Gray
Mansfield Park
One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest
To the Lighthouse
Tess of the D’Urbervilles
Oliver Twist
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time
Dune
The Prince
The Sound and the Fury
Angela’s Ashes : a memoir
The God of Small Things
A People’s History of the United States : 1492-present
Cryptonomicon
Neverwhere
A Confederacy of Dunces
A Short History of Nearly Everything
Dubliners
The Unbearable Lightness of Being
Beloved
Slaughterhouse-five
The Scarlet Letter
Eats, Shoots & Leaves
The Mists of Avalon
Oryx and Crake
Collapse : how societies choose to fail or succeed
Cloud Atlas
The Confusion
Lolita
Persuasion
Northanger Abbey
The Catcher in the Rye
On the Road
The Hunchback of Notre Dame
Freakonomics : a rogue economist explores the hidden side of everything
Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance : an inquiry into values
The Aeneid
Watership Down
Gravity’s Rainbow
The Hobbit
In Cold Blood : a true account of a multiple murder and its consequences
White Teeth
Treasure Island
David Copperfield