If you see a whole thing - it seems that it's always beautiful. Planets, lives... But up close a world's all dirt and rocks. And day to day, life's a hard job, you get tired, you lose the pattern. - Ursula K. LeGuin

Monday, August 24, 2009

An Anniversary--Of Sorts

Angel left today for school. As I walked to the university I realized that its been a year since I first let him go. The letting go was much easier (yeah...massive understatement) this time. I actually found it amusing when he said "I'll see you at Christmas. It will be fun."

So on the one hand I'm glad he's gone. Life is much less complicated without him here and its painful to watch how unhappy he is being home. On the other hand I feel bad being happy that he's gone.

Tomorrow is my first day of teaching, which will mark the beginning of my 4th year of teaching at my university. I'm excited to meet my students but sad to see the summer gone.

Sometimes there are no easy answers.


Seeking Solace said...

Sadly, there are no easy answers. Boy, do I wish there were!

Hope you have a great semester. Angel too.

Julie said...

In the past year, your posts about Angel have been very interesting. Your words have also been helpful to me as a mom. You have made a wonderful (and normal) progression from the "first time he left" to now.

I feel so much in common with your thoughts and fears, and I still do. It helped me a lot. One way I differ is that I tend to go into denial, which is not good. Reading your thoughts has helped me face reality and learn to deal with it. Thank you very much!

Happy new year:) I hope it's a great one for you and your family.

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