If you see a whole thing - it seems that it's always beautiful. Planets, lives... But up close a world's all dirt and rocks. And day to day, life's a hard job, you get tired, you lose the pattern. - Ursula K. LeGuin

Monday, June 22, 2009

A Birthday Post

I met b 3 months after I officially left my Ex. I wasn't looking for a real relationship but there was something about b that made me pursue one. I asked b out on our first 2 dates. The first date was for drinks on a Friday night. We didn't have much time. I had to pick Angel up from his dad and the next day I was leaving for a business trip to Seattle. The next afternoon I left early for the airport and got to my gate before my flight was posted. Normally I spend all my waiting time working but that day I sat around leisurely thinking about the previous night's date. In my daydreaming I lost track of time. At some point I realized I should be boarding but there was no one at my gate. I had completely missed all the gate change announcements and although I ran to the new gate (in another terminal) it was too late. They put me on another flight that left at 6am Sunday morning. I wasn't needed in Seattle until Monday morning, so this was not a huge problem. I quickly realized that I had a free Saturday night (Angel was spending the weekend with his Dad because of my travels) so I called b from the airport and asked him if he'd like to take me out to dinner.

That was the best date of my life.

Our early dating life was a bit rocky. I did just about everything you shouldn't do: I left my toothbrush the first time I stayed over; I was way too extravagant in my gift giving on his first birthday; I said "I love you" when I knew he couldn't reciprocate. I could blame it all on my general lack of dating experience (I had been with my Ex since I was sixteen) but I did know better. There was just something about b that felt right and now over 10 years later it is still right.

Today is b's birthday and he is in Seattle. I thought I would post a poem that I wrote about b, early in our relationship but after the bumpy dating years.


You and I

do not make

for great love


With us

there is no pining;

no heartfelt stares;

no deep sighs;

no dreams left


Life without you

still has air;

it has birds

and flowers

and beauty


I just don’t


With you

there are no

syrupy songs;

just sweet air

and the rhythm

of you and me--

breathing in,

breathing out.


as it should


Happy Birthday b...I'll see you in Seattle.


Anonymous said...

get here soon, I love you and miss you.


drax said...

Aaww! Really, a heartfelt "Aaww."

Seeking Solace said...

AWWWWW. Happy Birthday to B.

Julie said...

Beautiful!!! I'm turning mental flips, because you posted a poem. No, I'm turning mental flips because you posted such an AWESOME poem. I love the title, and the last stanza hits with a beautiful thump (though I love it all).

Happy birthday to b. He must be a really special guy to have you:)

life_of_a_fool said...

yeah! happy birthday to b!

I love reading posts about b (and Angel) -- you're a relationship role model for me. have a great trip!

Annie King said...

A beautiful tribute!