Complete the:

As seen over at Dr. Curmudgeon's:

1. My uncle once: wrote for a pornographic magazine.
2. Never in my life: have I been as blessed as I am now.
3. When I was five: my parents bought me a cat who hated children.
4. High school was: filled with nerds and yet I still hated it.
5. I will never forget: giving birth...that's why I never did it again.
6. Once I met: Alan Alda in my best friend's living room.
7. There’s this boy I know: who's about to embark on an amazing journey.
8. Once, at a bar: I kissed b for the very first time.
9. By noon, I’m usually: almost awake and mostly coherent.
10. Last night: b and I enjoyed cocktails on the veranda.
11. If only I had: high cheekbones I could wear my hair really short.
12. Next time I go to church: the devil will cry.
13. What worries me most: is turning the corner and meeting overwhelming grief.
14. When I turn my head left I see: b surfing the internet.
15. When I turn my head right I see: Pupzilla chewing her leg.
16. You know I’m lying when: I stammer and turn several shades of red.
17. What I miss most about the Eighties is: irrelevant since I can't remember the Eighties.
18. If I were a character in Shakespeare I’d be: played by a man.
19. By this time next year: I'll be submitting my tenure packet.
20. A better name for me would be: Snorsie McSnorington
21. I have a hard time understanding: materialism.
22. If I ever go back to school, I’ll: know that I lost my mind.
23. You know I like you if: I cook for you.
24. If I ever won an award, the first person I would thank would be: my husband, who is responsible for the rotation of my world.
25. Take my advice, never: say never.
26. My ideal breakfast is: waffles and eggs!
27. A song I love but do not have is: impossible to find.
28. If you visit my hometown: pick up the pace and, no matter what, DO NOT stop in the middle of the sidewalk to gawk at the buildings.
29. Why won’t people: save the whales?
30. If you spend a night at my house: you share a bed with Pupzilla.
32. The world could do without: McMansions.
33. I’d rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: live through adolescence again.
34. My favourite blonde(s) is/are: Boy.
35. Paper clips are more useful than: academic committees.
36. If I do anything well it’s: completely by accident.
37. I can’t help but: smile when Boy calls me "mama."
38. I usually cry: quietly.
39. My advice to my child/nephew/niece: is "be yourself."
40. And by the way: consider yourself tagged.